This blog is going to be a bit different. I usually go on about whatever is on my mind at the time and it turns into what I hope people will think is a good read that’s educational and informative. Though I hope the same for this one, I’m going to write several anecdotes about things that happen at work. They didn’t all happen on the same day. But, they all happen. The trick is learning to cope with all the ignorant, ass cocks you run into every day, enjoy the good things that happen to the fullest, and laugh and shake your head at the stupidity.
1) I work in the plumbing department. Me and a coworker from the same department came around the corner to find a woman on our phone at the desk. We asked her if we could help her and she said yes. She wanted information on heaters. Heaters are not in our department. We asked her why she was on the phone and she said she wasn’t on the phone. We’re still trying to figure out that whole situation.
2) One morning when I was opening the store I had a group of three people came in essentially when we open the doors. As I was returning from the morning meeting I went up to the first person and asked if I could help. They showed me a fitting and said I think this is what I need to do this particular thing and I told him it was correct. As I approach the second person, they asked where particular item was and I directed them to it. The third person I came to handed me a brass fitting and told me that he needed one just like it but opposite. The brass fitting had a flare half-inch male on one side and a compression half-inch male on the other. I gave him what I believed he asked for which consisted of the female fittings. He insisted this isn’t what he needed. He needed the same thing he had but the opposite. Once again I explained to him that this was everything that he asked for. He once again insisted that he needed exactly what he had but the opposite. I took it out of his hand turned it around and put it back in his hand and I swear you could see the lightbulb go off in over his head. He actually didn’t think to just turn it over and use it the opposite direction.
3) One day while I was at work, I had to go use the facilities. As I was coming out of the facility, this old woman was heading in. When she saw me her eyes went wide and she backed up right into the wall behind her. You would think she just saw Satan incarnate in front of her. She went and complained to the head cashier who told her that I did in fact belong in the ladies room so she asked to see a manager, who told her the same thing. I haven’t seen her in the store since. Apparently, people like me shouldn’t even be in the store and I should’ve been fired. Well, according to this “lady”, anyway.
4) As I was doing some zoning in my department, I came across several items that were left by customers from other areas of the store. After I had several of these items built-up I decided to return them to their respective departments. As I was walking down the center aisle of the store, this couple, I would say in their 30s with two kids, came out the end of one of the side aisles. When they saw me they backed up and the mother reached down and pulled the kids in towards her to protect them like I was going to eat them for breakfast or something. It was actually hysterical the way they reacted like I was a lion or a tiger or a wolf or something that was going to do her children harm. How do people learn to be so naïve about other people?
5) I was working a mid shift one day, and could tell as soon as I got there that my coworker was having a bad morning. I immediately jumped into helping to try and alleviate some of the tension with the customers. This woman handed me her phone with a picture on it of a water supply line. It was a 20 inch, 3/8 by 1/2 inch supply line. She informed me that she needed the same thing but in 24 inches. I told her that I could give her a 30 inch supply line. She informed me that 30 inches was too long, she only needed 24 inches. I assured her the 30 inch line would work just fine and that they did not make a 24 inch supply line. When I handed her the 30 inch supply line she told me that she could not use that one because it was backwards. It took me half an hour to convince this woman that it was the same line it was just written the opposite way on the line I gave her as it was on the line in the picture.
6) One day when I was working the department by myself, I received a phone call from a customer asking if we had a certain item in stock. Knowing where the item is kept in the department, I walked down to take a look to see if it was on the rack. I informed him that we did have two in stock and that he could come and pick it up anytime he wanted. He demanded at this time that I have it down and on a cart and up front waiting for him when he got there, because he didn’t have time to deal with waiting for it once he got here. I told him I was not allowed to pull any items off the shelf that weren’t paid for. He got extra pissy with me and told me, “it’s bad enough I’ve got to talk on the phone with a fucking freak like you. I’m not gonna go back there and have to deal with you in person.”
7) I was returning from the receiving area with an associate after putting a piece of power equipment away. We were walking through the aisle with the hot water heater’s and there was a gentleman standing there looking very perplexed. I asked him if there was anything we could do for him. He told me that he was looking for a particular hot water heater. I informed him that we do not have the hot water heater’s that he was looking for in stock but I’ll be happy to look it up for him. He looked at me and said, “I don’t want you looking it up for me.” My associate then offered to look it up for him. At this point the man just turned and walked away. Later that day one of the ASMs came back to the department to let us know that the customer had complained about service in our department. I knew right away who he was talking about because he mentioned hot water heaters. I told him that I offered to look it up and what the guy had said, and that my associate had offered to look it up for him as well. It was at this time that he informed me that the guy told him that ***** should not have an abomination to God working in their store and that I should be sent to hell as fast as possible. My ASM informed him that he didn’t need to shop at our store if he felt that way.
I saved my all-time favorite for last.
8) I had been working in the store for about a week and a half when I went down the faucet aisle to ask a couple if I could help them. They both looked at me with with pure unadulterated hatred in their eyes. The man, somewhere in his mid 20s, looked at me and told me to get the fuck away from him. That I shouldn’t be alive. His wife snickered as he continued to tell me what a despicable, lowlife, piece of shit, nothing I was. According to him, I was a freak of nature and should be put out of my misery. He informed me that if he ever came across to me when I was not at work, he would see to it that I would never bother another human being again because he would send me to hell where I belong. After this experience was over, I went up to the store manager and told him what had happened. I asked him how I should handle the situation. He informed me that the most important thing was to offer “excellent customer service”. I’m still trying to figure out how I’m supposed to offer excellent customer service when I’m dead.
And people wonder why transgender people are suicidal.
dragonsfaerie 